Sensitive Matter, Revisited
As some of you may remember, I had a night several weeks ago where I had terrible gas all night long. I had to get up every few minutes to keep from stinking up the whole bed. I had surmised that beer was to blame, since my father has been known to develop beer-related gas. However, much experimenting had yielded no conclusive results.
Well last night I suffered a repeat of the phenomenon! This time, I may have found a positive correlation between the two events. Dennis had come over with his new girlfriend Barb, and we went out to eat together. I had a portabella mushroom sandwich for dinner, along with some root beer. Then we came home and watched a fabulous movie called The Price of Milk which is a delightful and incredibly unique movie from New Zealand about a dairy farmer, his girlfriend, and a mysterious family known only as ‘The Jacksons.’ The movie is a sort of modern fairy tale, with absurd humor, lessons about love, and hundreds of tiny shoes. The movie has been described as “The Princess Bride on acid,” a summary I find reasonably accurate. Either way, I highly recommend “The Price of Milk.”
Anyway, back to the farting! That fateful night several weeks ago when I suffered the same gas, I had eaten, you guessed it, a portabella mushroom sandwich! Now, it would be unfortunate if the mushrooms were giving me gas, but it is plausible. I’m planning some controlled experiments to see if I can duplicate the gas using a mushroom sandwich. Madalene won’t be happy about it, but its a worthy sacrifice in the name of science. Stay tuned for more!
2 comments Monday 10 Mar 2003 | Sam | Personal
that just confirms my research and justifies my hypothesis that men are stinky. my research spans many years (and many men)so i know it’s valid. so there, nya nya nya.
Uh-oh—you suffer from Shroom Intolerance. Time to stock up on that handy remedy, Shroom-o!
(Unless it’s really lactose intolerance, stimulated by watching a movie about milk.)