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Tonight Madalene and I went out to eat Vietnamese food at a place called Lemongrass for our anniversary, which celebrates six years together. Our celebration has been rather restrained, partially due to neither of us having much in the way of funds for anything lavish. This morning she did bring me ice cream in bed, and brought over an "Onion":http://www.theonion.com to read, which was quite romantic. Barb and Dennis spent some time with us last night, and being their 6 month anniversary, it was pleasant. Berg spent some time over too, though he left early to go write some music. We opened a bottle of New Belgium's La Folie, which is a bizarre wood-aged lambic style beer. It is very sour, and best served like a wine. Sour, woody and earthy are all words used to describe the experience. It really doesn't feel like 6 years, but a glance at the calendar confirms it once again. The Vietnamese food was simple but good, and the service was very nice. Then we went grocery shopping. Madalene is making some pudding, and I am enjoying a beer. It has been a simple but good anniversary (like the food). At the grocery store, I decided to buy a few pint glasses. They have a very good selection of glasses at the store for only $1.99 each, which is a very good price. So I perused for a while, and ended up choosing several "New Belgium Brewing Co.":http://www.newbelgium.com glasses. Two traditional pint glasses, slightly flared, one with the 1554 Black Ale beer logo, and the other with their Sunshine Wheat logo. A standard pint glass is a very reliable beer glass. Nearly any style of beer works in a pint glass, and it feels good to the hand. The second style of glass I got was a pair of tulip glasses with the basic New Belgium logo. Tulip glasses look like a red wine glass, but are much larger, to accommodate a full 12-16 oz. of beer. They are geared towards Belgian style beers, because they concentrate the head and aromas, much like a snifter will. Belgians take their beers very seriously. Read more about "the Worthy Glass":http://newbelgium.com/n_culture.shtml. Now, I shall continue my relaxing.

I hereby enact the sacred right of Martian Law! Under Martian Law, I now declare myself married to actress Adrian Barbeau, queen of Mars from Olympus Mons to Tharsus! In honor of the Great Red Planet, I demand that all readers bow their heads to Aries, God of Mars! The punishment for blasphemy shall be death! I also demand that all readers go outside and look at Mars, because this is it! Mars is currently closer to Earth than it has been in nearly 60,000 years, approaching to about 56 million kilometers. It is now the second brightest object in the night sky, out-shined only by the moon. Viewing by telescope will be excellent over the next few weeks, with even amateur telescopes being able to easily distinguish the dark plains regions, and the white polar caps on the disc. In case you are wondering, the part of Earth that was closest to Mars was Tahiti, which was facing Mars at the exact moment of alignment, which occurred very early Wednesday morning. Don't worry that the moment has passed. Mars and Earth will be staying very close all through the month of September, and viewing will actually get easier as time goes on because Mars will be rising earlier and earlier here in the western hemisphere. Mars will look much as it does normally in the sky, no need to fear a great looming red orb. However, it will be brighter than normal, reaching a magnitude of about -2.8, looking like a large bright ochre star. So go take a look, for goodness sake. Even if you just stare up at it for a second and muse about how far 56 million kilometers (34.6 million miles) really is. Oh, red planet, so close, yet so far. Related Links: * "Spacetoday.net brief":http://www.spacetoday.net/Summary/1878 * "Science@NASA article":http://science.nasa.gov/headlines/y2003/25aug_closeencounter.htm * "AP article (on Yahoo.com)":http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&cid=624&ncid=624&e=3&u=/ap/20030827/ap_on_sc/mars

You probably know about the four basic tastes, sour, sweet, salty and bitter. But were you aware that there was a fifth? Just now coming into understanding by the scientific community, a taste known only as "Umami" has been understood by Japanese chefs for over 100 years. Translating roughly to 'savory', the taste is described as a sort of richness, or meatyness. It fills our mouth with satisfying savory goodness. As you can see, it is hard to describe. Different taste systems evolved to help us get the nutrients we need. Our sweetness receptors let us know when we are eating enough sugars. We crave them because we need it. Salty sensors let us know if we are getting the required minerals with our food. Sour and bitter detectors help us identify potentially hazardous substances, such as poisonous fruits or bugs, which are likely to be acidic or alkali. Umami is our 'protein' taste. It is the flavor of free amino acids, particularly glutamates. In fact, MSG (monosodium glutamate), the sodium bound version of the glutamate molecule, was originally invented to enhance umami flavor. It makes sense that we would have taste receptors for umami, because our bodies need these amino acids, since they are the basic building blocks for proteins our body needs. To detect them and find them 'delicious' helps us get enough. Umami is hard to describe in part because it is hard to identify compounds that are umami tasting. Salt is easy, we have pure table salt (sodium chloride) to taste. For sweet we have pure sugars, like glucose, fructose and sucrose. For bitter, alkaloids like those found in coffee are easily found. For sour, we have the acidic juice of a lemon. The numerous compounds that all contribute to umami are not as well understood, and not as readily isolated. For comparison, imagine if pure sugar did not exist, and the sweetest things we had were carrots and milk. In that case, 'sweetness' would be as difficult to pinpoint and describe as umami is. Definitely there, and definitely playing part, but difficult to separate from its surroundings. There are few things in which umami is the dominant taste, and hence it is hard to clearly identify in the mind. But once aware of its presence, you can begin to taste more discriminatorily, looking for the similar taste in various umami rich foods. If you wish to taste umami, look to fermented products. One of the richest sources of umami is fermented fish sauce, common in asian cooking. The sauce has a terribly pungent odor that feels like getting slapped in the face with a fermented anchovy. However, when cooked, the odors all cook off, and you are left with a very large quantity of amino acids, giving a strong umami flavor to the food. This accounts for much of the richness and savory flavor in what would be an ordinarily bland Thai dish. Umami is also found in some wines, aged cheeses, fermented soy sauce, aged meats, mushrooms, and certain vegetables, like asparagus. If you've ever wondered why anchovy is in caesar salad dressing, then now you know the answer. Simple vegetables take on a much richer and complex flavor with just a little umami. This is why caesar is one of the most popular salad dressings in the US. This evening, as an experiment with umami, Barb, Dennis, Berg and I made a batch of Pad Thai noodles. Normally fish sauce is used (to give an umami flavor to normally not-very-savory tofu, noodles, and onion), but as a vegetarian, I needed another source of umami. We experimented with mushroom sauce, which is a salty, umami rich sauce derived from mushrooms. Used like fish sauce, it is very pungent, but leaves behind a rich flavor that is quite delicious. Next time you are cooking a meal, think about your sources of umami, meats, aged cheeses, mushrooms, fermented sauces like fish sauce, mushroom sauce, fermented soy products like tempeh and soy sauce, and vegetables like asparagus and to a lesser degree, tomato. For a good non-asian example, imagine the goodness arising from pasta, cooked tomato sauce (cooking brings out much of the umami flavor in the tomato), and aged parmesan or romano cheeses. What would be pretty ordinary flavors come alive with the rich, savory flavor of umami. A little knowledge of this newly understood flavor can make your cooking experience much more effective. Eat with pleasure.

Yesterday, Wesley Willis "passed away":http://www.alternativetentacles.com/wesleywillis.htm ("Rolling Stone Article":http://www.rollingstone.com/news/newsarticle.asp?nid=18568), succumbing to Chronic Myelogenous Leukemia at the age of 40. An independent musician and native of Chicago, he astounded and amazed the indie rock world with his absurd, brazen, and comical songs, first played on the street with only his voice an an old Technics keyboard. His unique style was a favorite of groups like the Dead Kennedys and Smashing Pumpkins, with his biggest fan being Jello Biafra himself. He will be remembered as a hilarious and entertaining aspect of punk rock. He embodied persistence, individuality, and the spirit of doing what you love, no matter what people think about it. Rock on Chicago, rock on Wesley Willis.

In the first of a series I'd like to call the "Foods That Are Rolled" dinners, Berg, Dennis and I made enchiladas and spring rolls. The feast was quite mighty, and we accompanied it with a white merlot and the Terry Gilliam classic film, "Time Bandits":http://us.imdb.com/Title?0081633. Time Bandits, in case you haven't seen it, is about a troupe of midgets who steal a map to the universe from God, then use it to traipse around through time trying to get rich. Its right up my alley in terms of subject matter and execution. Speaking of which, we need more ideas for things that are rolled. Perhaps burritos, or egg rolls, or blintzes or something. Please post any suggestions you have. Oh, and if anyone suggests 'rolling a doobie' they get a kick in the jimmies.

Today after work I got some airbrushing done, some of which I'm satisfied with, and some of which I'm not. Unfortunately, the stuff I like and the stuff I don't like are on the same t-shirt. Oh well, its only a 2 dollar shirt, and I'll probably still wear it. Then I went over to Dennis, Dan and Caroline's for a little party. Dan and Caroline are leaving for Vienna on tuesday, meaning I won't see them for two months. Very sad. Dennis wasn't feeling all that social, so he and Barb left for a while. Then I got a call from Barb asking me to come pick them up, because they had walked a long ways. So I did, and then we went to TWO different Taco Bell's, looking for a mexican pizza. Unfortunately, one Taco Bell was closed, even though many of them seem to have 24 hour drive-thrus now. The other didn't even have a drive-thru, and though the sign outside said that they were open until 1am on sundays (this was about 12:30am), the doors were locked, and the lights were out. There was also a man sleeping in a parking space behind the Taco Bell. We decided to go to Steak and Shake for shakes and fries instead. Then we went back to the house, and many people had left. We spoke in French, discussed Communism, and commented that it was so hot that having someone spit in your face was comfortable, because it was like a cool mist. So I blew raspberries at Caroline, bathing her in a fine spray of saliva, which she basked in. It was like a really messed up cosmetics commercial. Then we watched Monty Python's Holy Grail, while people fell asleep one by one. I gave Caroline a goodbye hug, since she was sleeping on the day bed, all curled up like a doormouse, and slipped away to scoot home. We'll miss her and Dan, but she promised she'd send me something from Vienna, so that helps.

Today has been a bad day. I woke up to my landlord coming in to fix our microwave, which he had woken me up to install the other day, only to do it wrong, necessitating today's visit. Then I had to drive Madalene to the airport to fly to Colorado. However, instead of getting tickets out of the St. Louis airport, she got tickets out of the Kansas City airport because they were cheaper. She was intending to drive her car there and park it while she was in Colorado, but since a friend wrecked her car the other day, we had to borrow his car. He was very gracious in letting us use it, but it meant that instead of being able to just park it in Kansas City, I had to drive there with Madalene, and then drive the car back that day. I'll have to do the same thing in a few days to pick her up from the Kansas City airport, unless she buys a new car in Colorado, in which case she'll be driving it back. However, the car we were borrowing is pretty old, and while its in good general working order, its air conditioning isn't functional. This, combined with the fact that it was over 105 degrees out, made the 4 hour drive to Kansas City downright miserable. The heat, combined with the fact that in order to survive, we had to have the windows all rolled down, which created a deafening roar on the highway, gave us both bad headaches. Also, we hit horrible traffic jams coming out of St. Louis, meaning Madalene nearly missed her flight. We were delayed even further when a security team took it upon themselves to completely unpack Madalene's possessions, lay them out on a table, and carefully examine each individual item. One guard pawed through her underwear on a table right next to the main terminal hallway where every slack jawed passerby could see, while three other security guards stood nearby whispering and chuckling to each other. I don't even see why its worth even packing your stuff, you should just bring your empty bags, then all your stuff in a big ass trash bag. Then just dump it all on the floor and let the guards paw through it and then stuff it into your luggage when they are done. That would save you from having your carefully packed baggage completely undone and hastily repacked, you could just let them hastily pack it when they are done, and forget the work of actual packing it beforehand. Then, on the way home, in the heat of the afternoon, I was feeling very unpleasant. I pulled over and holed up in a Subway for a few hours, hoping the heat would begin to die down a bit. As soon as the heat got down to a paltry 100, I decided to be on my way again. I was in a hurry to get out of the horrific Kansas City highway system, and wanted to get home in time for a friend's birthday celebration. However, I got pulled over by a cop on my way out of town. He claimed I had been speeding, which I probably was by a small amount, but certainly not the amount he was claiming. However, I wasn't in the mood to argue about it too heavily. Then he got me out of my car, and sat me down in his. He told me that I and the car smelled like marijuana. He told me that he could smell it on me clearly. I told him that there was nothing of the sort on me, in me, or in the car. Then he administered a little sobriety test, and then took my pulse. He said my pulse was way to high for me to be sober, and that I was lying to him about being high. I told him that I had just been driving in 100+ degree weather in a horrifically loud car, and that I was pretty stressed out from the day's circumstances, and rather nervous at having been accused of being a liar and a felon. He didn't believe me, so called for backup. He asked if I would consent to a search, so I let him search me, but told him not to search the car, because it wasn't mine and I didn't feel it was my place to give consent for its search. Then he flat out told me that because of my responses and behavior, he knew I was lying to him, and that I had marijuana in the car. He told me to just confess, so the penalties would be less than if I lied about it and was caught. I told him I wasn't lying, then nervously sat in his car and waited. Finally backup came, and the second cop sat me down and questioned me. He was playing good cop, while the other one was playing bad cop. He asked me about my job, and about St. Louis and other pleasant topics ("Oh, you live in the U. City area, eh? Nice place, I grew up there myself, very pretty, blah blah blah."), all the while eyeing me and trying to figure out if I was high or not. Then he told me that the marijuana smell that the first officer detected was considered probable cause, and that they could arrest me and search the car without my consent. I don't know where this marijuana smell business was coming from. I couldn't smell a thing, and the second cop never mentioned that he could smell it. Sure, the car wasn't very clean, and smelled a bit like cigarette smoke. Also, I certainly wasn't clean, having been sweating like a damn dog for the last 7 hours. Add to that the smells of Subway sandwich wrappers, stale Mt. Dew, and a partially spilled bag of Sun Chips and that amounts to quite a few odors to deal with. However, marijuana wasn't part of that equation in the slightest. Finally they both sat me down and told me that if I didn't consent to a search that they would send for a K9 unit. I finally broke down and let them search the car. I didn't want to. I wanted to stand up for my rights. I wanted to say, "Bring the dogs. I am certain of my innocence, and I won't allow you to violate the privacy of my friend's car. Let them smell it, and prove you wrong." But my voice fell flat, and I caved. The 'good cop' chatted me up while the 'bad cop' searched the car. He didn't find anything of course, so he just sat me down again, and decided to give me a fat speeding ticket. Thats exactly what I need now, being on only part time wages. After several more excruciating hours of driving, I finally arrived back home. Its now after midnight. I've been out of the house since about 10:30am, I've only had one meal all day, and I feel like crap. I've also missed Tommy's karaoke party. I might be able to catch the end of it, but I'm filthy and I have a headache, and I have to work tomorrow morning anyway. I'm also good and excited about getting to pick up people from the airport both Monday and Thursday, when, if Madalene doesn't decide to buy a new car in Colorado, I'll have to make this same to/from Kansas city drive all over again. Plus the car needs gas, which is another thing I can't afford. This was supposed to be my birthday week, but I barely did any celebrating at all, since only a few of my friends weren't busy or out of town or something when I tried to get together with them. I didn't even do any relaxing because I was either stressed out at work doing things for another department that I don't know anything about, or driving people to and from the airport, or helping Madalene with insurance hassles, or something. And now I've got a 108$ ticket as my present to myself. The moral of the story is: Never leave your house, because bad stuff happens out there. I'm going to wash the stink of sweat, road, and whatever that damn cop was sure was weed off of myself, drink a gallon of water, take some Ibuprofen and sleep a few hours before work. Oh, and I just found out that my PC isn't workin properly. Goodie.

Today is my womb exit anniversary day. That is, the day I was born. Its surprisingly unexciting at the moment, because today has been a bit of a stressful day. I took Berg to the airport at 7:30am, and then was treated to having to research the price of cars to replace Madalene's Subaru, which was wrecked by a friend the other day (and is being declared a total loss by the insurance company). Also, I have to work extra early tomorrow morning, and I'm filling in for the summer camp department, whom I've never worked for before. I have to manage an entire summer camp class all by myself, all day long, because they don't have enough staff. I suppose their eyes were bigger than their staff when they decided to book this many kids. I don't know what I'm supposed to do with a bunch of 10 year olds for an entire day. Anyway, I'm a little older now. Tomorrow evening, when things are less stressful, I'm going to eat some cake. That will be nice.

Today I made a deal with Satan. Why? Because he offered me a gift I could not refuse. America Online sent me an offer for a free set of Altec computer speakers (including a subwoofer) if I signed up for a free trial of their "Bring your own access" broadband plan. I can always use another set of speakers, so I signed up. Since I already have broadband, I didn't need to dial any numbers, or do anything besides install the AOL software and sign in (oh, and give them my credit card number). I carefully read the terms of service and all the fine print, and it seems that because I'm not using any 'premium services' like their music streaming, and I'm not dialing any of their phone numbers, then I won't be charged anything at all, assuming I cancel within 45 days. However, I get the speakers just for signing up for the trial. Since you have to make an actual phone call to cancel service, they are probably banking on people not wanting to tell a person to their face that you don't want their service. Its easy to push a button that says "Cancel my Account", but its a lot harder to tell that to someone to their face. Of course, the monkey on the other end of the phone doesn't give a flying crap about whether or not you cancel, but they are probably trained to sound ever-so-slightly disappointed when they get a cancelation phone call, just to tear you apart inside. Humans are very easy to manipulate. If you give something to someone, they immediately feel a responsibility to 'repay' the favor somehow. This is why promotional items, even things as small as pens with a company logo, work. You read the name of the company, you accept the gift, and some small part of you feels an obligation to the company now. You might think, "Oh, I'm screwing them, because they paid for the pen, and now I'm just going to use it without ever patronizing the company," and in some cases, maybe you aren't going to ever patronize the company. However, the effect, over a large group of people, is quite powerful. There is no free lunch, you pay with your emotions, your desires, and your loyalties. All things considered however, I'm still playing their game, and getting the speakers. I used AOL service for about a year a very long time ago, back when local ISPs barely existed, and AOL, Compuserve and Prodigy were battling for dominance, and I still feel like they owe me for the experience. This will help settle the score between AOL and myself. Or maybe I'm just a tool, bending to the will of the dark side. Either way, in a few weeks you'll either see a post from me showing that my little plan was successful, or you'll see a post indicating that the devil's word is worth exactly what you think it is, and display a scan of my soiled credit card statement.

Today I took Greg to the airport to send him off to home. He will be missed, but he has school to start soon! Muahaha! This evening I went over to Dennis and Caroline's house to help set up a new VCR they had gotten, and set up a little RF modulator with their DVD player so they wouldn't get the annoying brightening and dimming routine you get when you plug a DVD player into a VCR and then into a TV (like you have to do with older TVs that have no composite, S-video or component inputs). The pulsing of the brightness is caused by Macrovision, which is an encoding that the DVD player applies to outgoing video that prevents you from making copies on VHS of the video. However, it screws people who are just trying to make use of an older TV. The RF modulator just has a video and audio input that you plug the DVD player into, and then an RF output to connect to the TV. It also has a pass-through for the antenna input (or a VCR). It switches automatically depending on which device is sending video. Pretty handy. While setting up the VCR, I was fiddling with connections, and I tried to put a tape into the VCR to test. However, I was met with resistance, and I realized there was already a tape in the VCR. They had gotten the VCR second hand, so I didn't think anything of it. As I pushed play and stuck my head into the entertainment center to fiddle with the wires in the back, I heard sounds of shock from the people sitting on the couch, Dennis, Barb, Caroline and Madalene. I didn't think anything of it until I plugged in the audio, and heard the unmistakable sounds of pornography. Forced moans, urgent grunts, and the omnipresent groove of 70's style porno-music. I looked up at the TV, and was greeted with a grainy film of several people getting their freak on. Caroline was shouting, "TURN IT OFF!! TURN IT OFF!!" and everyone else was either shouting along with her, or laughing their asses off. After laughing for a moment myself, I turned off the VCR, took out the tape, and put in a copy of "Better Off Dead" to test with instead. The video, as it turns out, was titled "Good Lust Charm" and looked to be old and well used. Some discussion arose about what to do with the tape, and it was eventually decided that some mischief is in order, though I am not at liberty to discuss the plans in any detail. Due to the fact that the VCR had changed hands several times to reach Dennis, we aren't sure where the tape originated, though we aren't sure we want to know.

Our trip back to St. Louis was uneventful, which in the case of travel, is usually a good thing. The interesting thing though, is that we brought my little brother Greg along with us. He's 15 and full of "piss and vinegar":http://www.thosedamnliberals.org which means he takes after his older brother quite nicely. We've been enjoying what St. Louis has to offer, such as the zoo, the science center, and thai food. One of the highlights so far has been going to the "City Museum":http://www.citymuseum.org/. The City Museum isn't quite like anything I've ever done before. It isn't really a museum so much as a playground for adults (though still fun for kids). After stepping into the facility, which was originally a shoe factory, you see pillars made of little gears, walls made out of old mouse cages, stairways made out of old conveyer belt systems, and other recycled objects. The main area is a ludicrous menagerie of recycled objects welded together to form a massive, three level playground. I climbed up to the next story inside of a coiled metal tube that was once part of a heat exchanger for a brewery. Then I wormed my way through a length of plastic tubing, and came out into a nest made of heavy rope tied together and dangling over open air. This place has to be seen to be believed. The rule seems to be: if you can get into it, or climb onto it, then you are meant to go there. Outside is what can only be described as a heap of old construction equipment, old airplanes, an 1800s era cabin, a movie screen, and a giant water bed, all piled on top of each other and welded together so you can climb on it. You end up 4 stories over the parking lot, climbing through tunnels made of welded rebar. This is what a playground should be! Its all been made just barely safe enough to be legal, though quite a few sharp edges, and potentially damaging falls are still possible, which only adds to the excitement, I feel. Plus, they are open until 1am on weekends. The entire facility is a huge testament to what a bunch of creative individuals can do with colorful paint, welding equipment, and more bizarre pieces of recycled machinery from around the city. Its like one giant modern art sculpture you can climb on. If you live in St. Louis and you haven't gone, you must. If you don't live in St. Louis, you should come visit, and then demand to have me take you.

Our journey to Oregon has been quite nice so far. We went whitewater rafting on the Upper Klamath river the other day, which was very exciting. The stretch includes several Class IV+ and Class V rapids, which are about as intense as you can raft on without special training. Our guide was very skilled, and we managed to keep everyone in the boat except for one little knock, when Greg fell out. We yanked him right back in though, and the trip continued as planned. My uncle Brad has been teaching me about mushroom hunting, and my grandmother gave me a nice identification book, "All the Rain Promises and More...", which is equipped with clear photos, excellent descriptions, good information on edibility (including recipe suggestions), and tons of anecdotal information about hunting for mushrooms, cooking them, and the whole culture of mushrooming. There are even stories scattered through the book about people's favorite mushroom hunt, favorite mushroom recipes, funny stories about mushroom related mishaps, etc. The book is very charming, and is guaranteed to make anyone want to get out there into the forest after a rain, and search for some forest floor treasures that have sprung up. We will be back on Friday, leaving behind the cool ocean breeze, and returning to the hot, muggy summer of Missouri.

Not quite like an out of body experience, but similar, in the sense that the inner vessel is separating from the outer vessel, but only for a short time. That is to say, I'm going on a trip. I'll be in Oregon for a week, leaving Friday morning, and getting back the following Friday. "Billy":http://www.billyk.com has kindly taken up the charge of watering my plants and making sure my fish have food. For his efforts, I shall lavish him with beers. Speaking of beers, the belgian strong that is brewing right now took off like a rocket, in a good way. At 48 hours after pitching the yeast, fermentation is already mostly done, going from a specific gravity of 1.080 to 1.046 in 48 hours. Not bad. This is pretty tough yeast, and fermentation is still quite active, so I'm hoping to hit 1.018 by the time I return from Oregon. We shall see. That would put the ABV(Alcohol By Volume) at about 8%, which is pretty stiff. The first tastes are too sweet and buttery (diacetyl), but its only been 48 hours, so I'm not worried. If things progress along these lines, this will be one kicking brew. Anyway... Posts will be sporadic for the week, though I'll still be responding to email.