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About this time, spinach bolts, sugar snap plants turn yellow, and tomatoes finally start to show promise. And luckily, even our shady plot is doing the same – a few things refused to come up, but for the most part it has kept my gardening needs and tastebuds fulfilled. It is pretty funny to find a new volunteer sunflower each week – I can only guess the last caretakers loved their sunflowers through the end of the season. They’re tenacious, and take no prisoners when it comes to battling for sunlight. That means most of them have ended up in the compost pile, though I left a couple just for the hell of it.

I should point out, that the cilantro planted at Sam’s request (I completely dislike cilantro) has gone to seed without being used. (Strike that for next year’s plot!) It’s a weird sort of power to be the primary gardener and meal determiner, without having to be the cook. However, I’ll harvest a little coriander (the seeds of the cilantro plant), as they wouldn’t hurt for the occasional recipe that uses the spice.

The tomatoes are starting to turn red, though all the fruits are much smaller than at other plots in the garden. While I am tempted to blame this solely on the lack of sun, neighbors with walls-of-water have tomato plants and fruits of tremendous size. That may need to be a change for next year – Colorado’s shorter growing season requires more gardener intervention of garden conditions.

The shade, however, dominates the plot – meaning that we are getting the most of (and most out of) the greens I planted in huge amounts. We still have plenty of collard greens, but most of the rainbow chard and all of the spinach was recently used in our Spanakopita:

Spanakopita

2 lbs. fresh spinach leaves

½ cup chopped fresh parsley

½ cup chopped fresh dill

2 cups finely chopped green onions

1 ½ tsp. fine grey sea salt

¼ cup extra-virgin olive oil

3 cups chopped onion

¼ tsp. coarse ground black pepper

½ lb. feta cheese, crumbled (traditionally made from sheeps milk, goat is also good)

14 filo leaves (usually sold frozen, thaw thoroughly!)

¾ cup clarified butter (ghee), melted

1. Wash and clean the spinach. Discard the stems. Drain and cut the leaves into shreds.


2. Combine the spinach, parsley, dill, green onions, and grey sea salt in a bowl. Let stand for 15 minutes, then press out all of the liquid.


3. Heat the extra-virgin olive oil in a skillet and sauté the 3 cups of chopped onions until soft and transparent. Add the spinach mixture from step 2 and sauté for a few more minutes. Add the feta cheese and black pepper.


4. Place each of 7 filo leaves in a buttered 10” x 17” x 2” baking pan, brushing each leaf with melted clarified butter. Add the spinach mixture from step 3, spread into a thick layer then add remaining filo leaves, again brushing each leaf with melted clarified butter. Cut into 3” x 3” pieces with a sharp knife.


5. Bake at 375 degrees for 30 minutes or until golden brown. From greysalt.com

I should note a couple variations on this recipe…for one, we use regular kosher salt – and the washing, tearing, and salting of the greens takes a significant period of time. It’s OK to change the amount of dill, green onion, and use regular butter instead of ghee. However, finding a cooperative filo dough is a challenge. We have yet to find one that works well, although we crudely work with it before it is thoroughly thawed. (It probably would work better if you moved the filo dough to the top shelf of the fridge in the morning, and to the counter at the start of cooking). Be patient with it, and liberal with the butter – it doesn’t want to fold nicely into the dish like you might expect of other doughs.

Last week we got a solid 24 hours of rain, uncommon for this area. In the middle of the storm, I was putting up cages around the tomato plants (which unfortunately are being attacked by flea beetles – hopefully they survive the assault) when I noticed two medium mushrooms peeking out from the undergrowth near our plot. They looked promising enough that I consulted our Colorado mushroom book when I got home. I had it narrowed down to either Shaggy Parasols or Shaggy Manes by the time I told Sam about it, and suggested he stop by to pluck them if he felt reasonably sure we could eat them without a trip to the ER. (Regular disclaimers apply: mushroom hunting is FULL of risks, you should only pick ones you are certain are edible, & consult professionals as needed!). Sunday, I find him sautéing up a couple slices of the one of the two now humongous mushrooms. Turns out they were indeed Shaggy Parasols – a good one for beginners, since it has some pretty good tests to ensure it is not the most similar poisonous mushroom. These guys, due to the rain and the rich soil we found them in; measured a good 15 cm across, and maybe 8 cm high. We took one to a friends’ BBQ, where it responded well to a mixture of soy sauce and red pepper flakes on the grill. The second one (minus the sample Sam took out, as seen in the picture) we used in one of our favorite dishes: a traditional risotto, based off the one used by Alton Brown. While it’s unlikely you’ll immediately have access to a shaggy parasol of this size, most mushrooms can be used in this recipe.

Shaggy Parasol & Asparagus Risotto
6 cups vegetable broth
1 cup dry white wine
2 tablespoons unsalted butter
1 cup finely chopped onion
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper
2 cups Arborio rice
5 ounces Shaggy Parasols, sautéed and coarsely chopped, approximately 3/4 cup
7 ounces asparagus, cooked and cut into 1-inch pieces, approximately 1 1/2 cups
4 ounces cheese (we use a combination of parmesan, sheep’s gouda, and gruyere), approximately 1/2 cup
1 teaspoon grated lemon zest (if you have it)
1/2 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg

This is a four pan dish, so clear the stove.

PAN #1:
In a medium saucepan with a lid, heat the vegetable broth just to simmering. Keep at a near boil.

PAN #2 (main pan):
In a large 3 to 4-quart heavy saucepan over medium heat, melt the butter. Add the onions and a pinch of salt and sweat until translucent, about 5 minutes. Add the rice and stir. Cook for 3 to 5 minutes or until the grains are translucent around the edges. Be careful not to allow the grains or the onions to brown.

(Pans #3 & #4 are for sautéing the mushrooms and steaming the asparagus, respectively)

Reduce the heat to low. Add the wine and enough vegetable stock just to cover the top of the rice. Stir or move the pan often, until the liquid is completely absorbed into rice. Once absorbed, add another amount of liquid just to cover the rice and continue stirring or moving as before. There should be just enough liquid left to repeat 1 more time. It should take approximately 35 to 40 minutes for all of the liquid to be absorbed. After the last addition of liquid has been mostly absorbed, add the mushrooms and asparagus and stir until risotto is creamy and asparagus is heated through. Remove from the heat and stir in the cheese, lemon zest, and nutmeg. Taste and season, to taste, with salt and freshly ground black pepper.

In honor of Bastille Day and Sheldon Brown’s birthday, I present the following recipe for vegetarian (or easily vegan) French Onion Soup. I suggest drinking it with real Champagne, and a sip of Cognac.

Serves 5-ish.

Tools

• Large, flat-bottomed pan or pot with lid or electric griddle
• V-slicer or mandolin (not necessary, but handy)
• Knife
• Cutting board
• Wisk

• Oven-safe soup crocks

  Ingredients

• 10 medium sized onions, vidalias work nicely
• 4 T. butter
• Kosher salt (table salt OK)
• 2 c. dry champagne
• 32 oz. vegetable stock, low salt version if available
• 10 oz. apple cider, unfiltered
• 1/4 t. Marmite or Vegemite
• Thyme
• Bay
• Parsley
• 1 loaf Country-style bread
• Black pepper
• Cognac or VSOP Brandy

• 8 oz. Gruyere, Emmenthaler or other swiss-style cheese

  Procedure

  To begin, we prepare the onions, the heart and soul of the soup. Slice each onion in half, and cut off the root end and the stem end. Slice in a longitude fashion (north/south, if the onion were the earth), which produces little ‘crescent moons’. This slicing style is called Lyonnaise, for some reason, probably relating to the French city of Lyons.

  If you have a V-slicer or mandolin (no, not the instrument, the cooking tool), you can just blast the onions into tiny slices like a machine, and be done in a few minutes. This is my preferred method.

  Once you have sliced all the onions, wipe the tears from your eyes, and begin heating your pot. The pot or pan should be large enough to hold all the onions, have a large bottom, and be equipped with some sort of lid. A large electric griddle would actually work nicely. Set the stove to medium/low, or your griddle to 300 degrees.

  Toss the butter into the pan, and allow it to melt and bubble for a minute. When it smells like nuts, it’s ready. Add the onions to the pan in layers. Each time you add a half inch layer, sprinkle a pinch of salt over the onions, and lay down another layer. When all the onions are added, cover the pan, and wait.

  It is key to note that we are not sauteing these onions, we are sweating them. The salt will pull moisture from them, and they will begin to stew in their own juices. If you here active ‘sizzling’ you should lower the heat. You just want a gentle bubbling sound.

  Wait at least 20-30 minutes, and then give the onions a bit of a stir. Don’t touch them before then! If you notice they are beginning to burn, then rejoice, because that is what you want! Let them burn, let them turn a rich mahogany color. You are caramelizing the sugars in a series of chemical reactions known as Malliard reactions that convert a few simple sugars into literally hundreds of flavorful compounds.

  Stir every 5 to 10 minutes until your onions are a good mahogany color. They should smell fantastic. Once the onions are sitting in a pool of their own liquid, feel free to remove the lid, and bring the heat up a bit. This will allow some of the water to boil off, and get that delicious burning action going.

  When your onions are a good dark color, after perhaps an hour, it is time to deglaze the pan. You’ll notice that a bunch of gunk is stuck to the bottom of the pan. This gunk is precious. Crank the heat up to maximum, and add 2 cups of the driest white wine or champagne you’ve got. Let it cook down until it takes on a syrupy consistency. Pour yourself a glass of said wine. One thing a chef never does is let wine go to waste.

  At this point, add the 32 oz. of vegetable stock, the 10 oz. of unfiltered apple juice, and the 1/4 teaspoon of Marmite or Vegemite (we’ll get into the why later).

  Return to a simmer, and lower heat to medium/low. Tie the thyme, bay and parsley together with a piece of string (a bouquet garni), and toss it in. These herbs are delicious, but tough to eat, so we�ll remove them later.

  Simmer the mixture for 15 to 20 minutes. In the meantime, cut your crusty bread into rounds that will fit into your oven safe soup bowls. I like to use the bowls as big cookie cutters to help shape the bread. Fire up the broiler in your oven to maximum broil, and toast the pieces of bread on both sides, until golden brown and delicious (GB & D). This is also a good time to grate up some of your swiss cheese, enough to cover the surface of each piece of bread with a full layer.

  When the soup has simmered for 15-20 minutes, give it a taste. It will probably need a little salt, and a few good cranks of black pepper. Then, with a flourish, toss in a good splash of Cognac or VSOP Brandy. Don’t measure it out, just splash some out of the bottle, like the saucy chef you are. Stir it in, and let it cook for another moment, to burn off a little of the alcohol. However, realize that the claim that the alcohol ‘cooks out’ is a lie. Some of the alcohol will indeed cook out, but it is actually impossible to remove it all. If that bothers you, skip the Cognac, it’ll still be good. You could also use a little sparkling grape juice for the wine in the beginning, though it’ll be a bit on the sweet side.

  Ladle the soup into your bowls, avoiding the bouquet of herbs, and place a crouton (that’s the now French word for those toasts you made) onto each bowl, floating gently on the soup. Cover with a modest layer of cheese, and then back into the hot broiler with them! It will only take a moment for the cheese to become bubbly and melted. Pull them out (carefully, they are freakishly hot), add spoons, and then enjoy! The goal, when eating them, is to get a little piece of cheese and crouton in with every bite. If you get to the end and have too much soup, or too much crouton, prepare yourself another bowl, and get it right this time!

  I recommend more of that dry wine or champagne you used for cooking. Open another bottle if you must.

  Notes

  Here are some notes on ingredients that I find helpful. First, the onions. 10 onions is a lot, and variation in size can make a big difference. I urge you to not worry about it that much. Unless your onions seem oddly tiny, 10 is a good number. When in doubt, add another onion! I’ve used some real monsters before that only took 6. Vidalia onions are best, because they come from a region of Georgia that has a very specific soil chemistry with very little sulfur, meaning the onions have as much as twice the sugar content of other onions, and less ‘heat’ because of the decreased sulfur content. Sometimes I mix things up a bit and use a few red onions in the mix.

  Butter can be exchanged for olive oil if you are vegan, but if you eat dairy, I urge you to use the butter, it really does help a lot, and even though it looks like a lot, spread over an entire batch, it’s not much at all.

  The wine you use should be dry. Too sweet and your dish will taste like maple syrup. Good, but a bit oppressive for an entire meal.

  The quality of your vegetable stock will play a huge role on the quality of your soup. Get the best you can! Many canned stocks are very salty, so either get the low-salt variety, or the kind in the cartons, which is often less salty. I like Trader Joe’s brand. If you make your own stock, or know someone who does, get that, it’ll rock.

  The Vegemite/Marmite is an odd ingredient, but its one of the linchpins of this whole recipe! French Onion soup traditionally uses beef consomme, which is a beef stock that is so thick and rich that it actually will solidify at room temperature. It takes a long time to make, and is very concentrated. Unfortunately, its flavor is nearly impossible to replicate.

  However, if we understand the recipe, we can understand how to replace it. The onions have sweetness, the wine tartness, the herbs and cognac add bitterness, and the salt adds saltiness. However, those are not the only four tastes! The fifth, and least understood taste, is known as Umami, or Savory. It is technically the flavor of free amino acids, but you know it as that distinctive ‘goodness’ associated with mushrooms, meats, aged sauces like soy sauce, and aged cheeses like parmesan. It is also the flavor that MSG aims to add to food. Beef consomme is a rich and powerful source of Umami, and simply leaving it out will damage your recipe’s balance. To replace it, we must find another source.

  Vegemite and Marmite are two brands of a hydrolyzed yeast product derived from the sludge of dead yeast left at the bottom of beer brewing containers. Through some odd sorcery and technologies, this sludge is concentrated into a dark, vile smelling paste. This paste is spread incredibly thinly on pieces of toast, and enjoyed by the British and Australians. They love it because hydrolyzed yeast product is nearly pure amino acid, the very Umami we seek!

  The addition of this Umami to our soup will complete the delicate balance that is the dish, and allow us a vegetarian recipe that doesn�t emulate beef consomme, per say, but holds its own against it as a unique, but balanced creation.

  Oh, and just to dispel a common misconception, yeast is not an animal, it is a fungus (like mushrooms), hence it is acceptable for all vegan and vegetarian diets.

  As a final note, your cheese matters a lot as well. Store Brand swiss will not serve you well. I recommend a good Gruyere, or Emmenthaler cheese, both available in your finer grocer-mart’s cheese case. Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s both have good cheese counters. Again, if you are vegan, leave out the cheese. You could sample some of the better soy based cheeses, but I’m not very familiar with them, so it would be an experiment on your part.

  Enjoy!

Cocoa is good stuff. Yes, its smooth, dark, delicious, warm and wholesome. It is also highly stimulating. The cocoa powder is enriched with a whole host of central nervous system stimulants including your old friend caffiene, as well as some other buddies, like theobromine. In fact, Cocoa’s scientific name, Theobroma cacao means “Food of the Gods”, because enough of it will cause you to speak to them. At least, thats what I hear…

The Azteks knew that spiciness was key to cocoa, and so do I. In honor of one of their other traditions, human sacrifice, here is a recipe and a method for incredibly spicy death cocoa. The basic cocoa recipe is lifted from the fabulous show, Good Eats, of which I have previously spoken. However, the final touch is pure Sam and Berg.

Ingredients

• 2 cups powdered sugar
• 1 cup cocoa powder (dutch process works best)
• 2.5 cups powdered milk
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 2 teaspoons cornstarch

• incredibly spicy hot sauce, like Dave’s Insanity Sauce

  Procedure

  This is easy. Take the dry ingredients and mix them together. Just put them in a container and shake it around. Thats it. Wow. Hard.

  The interesting part comes when you serve it. Fill a mug 1/3 full with your mix, then add enough boiling water to cover. Mix it up good with a spoon or whisk or chopstick or something. Then fill the rest of the way with boiling water. Hot milk can also be used for x-tra creamyness.

  Give it a taste. Hey, thats good cocoa. But it’s not done yet. Many cocoa recipes include a dash of cayenne pepper. As the Azteks teach us, spicyness and chocolate are two long lost brothers that must reunite with unequaled splendor in the cocoa mug. However, cayenne powder isn’t enough. You need to go straight to the source.

  We recommend a hot sauce with a Scoville rating of no less than 30,000. Forget Tabasco, that shit is weak (2,500 Scoville Units). At 51,000 Scoville Units, we recommend Dave’s Insanity Sauce, but any incredibly hot sauce will work. Here is a list of the hottest sauces in the world to get you started. Start with Dave’s Insanity at #33, and work your way up.

  Once you’ve chosen a sauce, use our handy dosing method. Take one chopstick, standard chinese size, though the vietnamese variety will work as well. If you ever hope to use the chopstick again, make sure it is plastic so that it can be fully sanitized after use. Now simply dip the chopstick into the sauce, and use it to stir the cocoa.

  Most of these sauces are too viscous to pour small drops, and you lose all dosing precision. However, the chopstick gives you precise control of your dose. I recommend starting with a 1 centimeter dip. Mix well and sample. Continue adding 1 centimeter dips until you are at the right place. As Berg aptly wheezed upon taking a hit off his newly spiced cocoa, “If it makes your head feel funny, it’s right.”

  This new concoction is both warming to the belly, and warming to the esophagus. The rush of endorphins released when the receptors on your tongue begin screaming in pain will drive away any winter sadness, and leave you giddy with pleasure. The stimulants in the cocoa will cheerfully wake you, without spinning you up like top. Plus, it is really cheap to make.

  If you enjoy the spicy cocoa, I recommend trying out spicy chocolate on other things, like spicy chocolate syrup on ice cream, or spicy chocolate bars, or even spicy brownies. You’ll find that, as odd as it seems, spiciness and chocolate really do go skipping hand in hand through the meadows of life.

Pesto is great. You know it, I know it. I like making it, and I like eating it. Here is my recipe. This recipe, like many of my others, is created ‘on the fly’, and I encourage you to mess with the proportions as you see fit.

This pesto originates in our garden, where we have three types of basil growing, traditional sweet basil, lemon basil (which has a serious lemon smell, much like lemongrass), and dark-side basil (a delicious dark purple leaved basil often called ‘purple basil’, however, it is clearly from the dark side of the force, hence its more appropriate name). We also have some thyme, mint, sage and arugula. We also have a bunch of dried tomatoes from the garden.

Why should these not join forces in one mighty pesto? No reason at all! It’s a vegetarian recipe, and can be made vegan through the elimination of one ingredient.

Ingredients

• 2 cups basil leaves (any kind of basil)
• 1/2 cup-ish mixed herb leaves
  • Sage?
  • Mint?
  • Arugula?
  • Thyme?
  • Rosemary?
• Spinach?
• 1/3 cup extra virgin olive oil
• 1/3 cup grated hard cheese
  • Asiago?
  • Parmesan?
  • Romano?
• A mixture of the above?
• 4 good cloves of garlic
• 1/3 cup unroasted/unsalted nuts
  • Pine nuts are classic
  • Walnuts are good too
  • So are cashews
  • And pecans
• And even almonds
• 1/2 cup sun-dried tomatoes
• 1 package (12.3oz) firm style silken tofu
• 1 good splash balsamic vinegar

• Big pinch of salt

  Procedure

  This is the hardest part: Take all the herb and basil leaves off of their stems, wash them, and put them in a colander to drain. It will take a long time, because 2 cups of leaves is a lot of damn branches of basil. It doesn’t matter much what your final amount of leaves is, but if its much more or much less than 2 cups after packing them into a measuring cup, adjust the rest of the recipe up or down a bit as necessary.

  Toss a handful of these leaves into a blender or food processor along with a small portion of the olive oil. Blend them. Blend them good. They’ll fight you, so be prepared to stop the blender, scrape down the sides, and fire it up again. Keep at it, slowly adding more of the basil and more of the oil as you proceed.

  Eventually, things will get rather pasty and consistent. Once you’ve integrated all the oil, and all of the basil and herb leaves, it is time to start on the other ingredients. Crush the garlic cloves by setting them one by one on a cutting board, placing the wide flat part of a dough blade or meat cleaver on them, and banging it with your palm. That will smash all the goodness out, and beats those stupid garlic presses into the ground. Toss the smashed remains of the garlic right into the blender, and make sure it gets well ground up.

  Add the nuts and cheese slowly, working them in as you grind. You can tune the amount of nuts to your liking, just add them slowly at first. Remember, you can always add more to a pesto, but its hard to get something back out.

  Now you should have a fairly standard herb pesto. Mostly basil, but with a few other herbs thrown in because they were growin’ in the garden anyway.

  I like to take things a step further with three more ingredients. First, a handful of sun-dried tomatoes. We make our own, but commercial ones are cool too. They bring a lot of goodness in a small space. It colors the pesto slightly, and you can really taste them. Its fabulous.

  Second. A box of silken tofu. Silken tofu is tofu that hasn’t had the water squeezed out of it hydraulically. It is what comes in those little ‘envelope’ boxes that look like juice-boxes. Mori-Nu is a common brand, and it can be found at most supermarkets near the ‘regular’ tofu, or in the ‘soy products’ area. Silken tofu is not as good for things like sauteing and grilling, but its great for blending. Toss a whole box of firm silken tofu into the mix. It will extend the pesto a bit, give it some nice texture and flavor, and add lots of helpful protein.

  Third. Balsamic vinegar. Since we’ve got basil, cheese and tomato, then why the hell don’t we have balsamic vinegar? It really belongs with the others, and its acids really ride that nutty wave in a happy way. Put a good splash of it in, and blend it up real good.

  Lastly, put in a big pinch of salt and mix it up, it’ll help, trust me. Taste your pesto. Is it good? Does it need more garlic? More nuts? More cheese? If it does, put them in! Every pesto is a bit different because of your starting herbs, and you’ll need to tweak a bit. Tweak the texture if you need by adding a bit more olive oil.

  Now, simply spread the yummy pesto on anything at all. I recommend bread, pizza, or pasta. You can refrigerate it for a few weeks, or freeze for a few months. Since it has no structure to speak of, it freezes and thaws pretty well.

This is a recipe I was given while looking for something to do with a big tub of red lentils I have. It’s a tasty dhal (like a very thick soup, good for spreading or pouring over rice or vegetables), and its rich in all sorts of nutrients. If eaten with rice, it forms a complete protein, the type that over 3 billion people eat every day. The recipe is Indian in style, but I don’t think it is totally ‘authentic’. Thats OK though. It is also vegetarian, and can be made vegan with a single substitution (olive oil instead of the butter).

The recipe is made in one pot, keeps well in the fridge, and is great reheated. Make a big batch, and use it for lunches or snacks!

Ingredients

• 2 Tbls butter, ghee or light olive oil
• 3 cloves garlic, peeled and minced or crushed
• 1 medium onion, white or yellow, chopped
• 1/2 Tsp turmeric
• 1 Tsp garam masala
• 1 Tsp ground cumin
• 1 Tsp chili powder (or more to taste)
• 2 16-oz cans chopped tomatoes (drained)
• 1 cup red lentils
• 2 Tsp fresh lemon or lime juice
• 2 1/2 cups veggie stock
• 5 oz coconut milk (a little more than half a cup)

• seasoning to taste (maybe something spicy?)

  Procedure

  Put the butter, ghee or olive oil in a large saucepan over medium heat. Toss the onion and garlic in, and sweat until transparent.

  When the onions are transparent, which takes just a few minutes, put in all your spices, and toss them around to get them well mixed. See the notes for some info about Garam Masala. Then its time to add the tomatoes, lentils, lemon juice, coconut milk and vegetable stock.

  Bring the mixture to a boil, and then back off the heat to a very gentle simmer, probably medium-low to low on your stove. Cook uncovered, stirring occasionally for 30 minutes. As you get closer to the end, stir more often, as the thickened lentils may want to burn to the bottom.

  At the end of 30 minutes, drop the heat down to warm, and give them a taste. They probably need some salt! Give a few pinches of salt to the lentils, stir it up really well, and taste again. Lentils, like beans, usually need a fair amount of salt to activate their flavors. Don’t worry too much about going overboard on the sodium, all of our ingredients are very low sodium to begin with, so adding some salt isn’t going to make a big difference, sodium wise.

  If you like your dhal a little spicy, toss in a finely chopped chipotle pepper! Give it a few cranks of freshly ground black pepper too.

  When the dhal is tasty enough, do what I do, put about half the dhal in a blender, and puree for just a moment. Mix the pureed dhal back into the rest of the batch. It makes for a much thicker, smoother dhal, but still has some nice little chunks in it for texture.

  I like to eat it right out of the cooking container with flat bread of some sort (naan would be good), or you can put it over rice or vegetables. Or just about anything. Its yummy, toss it around!

  Notes

  I mention in the recipe to sweat the onions. What is ‘sweating’? Well, its like a saute, but less. Your goal is not to brown the onions or fry them, it is to gently heat them to release their flavors. Sauteing seals in flavor, sweating releases it! You can tell if you have a sweat going by the fact that if you listen to the pan, you’ll only hear slight sizzling. If its a fast sizzle, or your onions are browning, the heat is too high. It is a common technique for situations where you are trying to release something’s flavor, like sauces, soups, or stews.

  When choosing stock, I like to buy the powdered kind bulk from the health food store, use about 1.5 tablespoons of powder per cup of water. You can also go with quality pre-made liquid stocks, but choose the low-fat, low-salt kind, you can always add more salt to a recipe, but if the stock is too salty, you can’t subtract saltiness. Avoid bouillon cubes, as Alton Brown says, they are just salt licks.

  The one weird ingredient I list is the Garam Masala. Garam Masala is a very savory little spice blend common in Indian cooking, and acceptable in many forms of cooking. It can be found at your local international grocery store, or you can cheaply make it yourself with bulk spices from the health food store or spice shop. Check out my Garam Masala recipe for the big info.

Garam Masala is a handy Indian spice mixture. It is good in lots of foods, with a very rich flavor and heady spice. Even if you don’t cook Indian, you’ll probably like it mixed in with other things to give them an exotic burst of goodness.

Most of all, its a handy intro to the world of making your own spice mixtures. Bulk spices are cheap as hell, and with very little effort, can be combined to produce fresh spice mixtures that blow anything you’d buy at the supermarket out of the water. Also, spices contain flavors that are very aromatic, which means they leave the spices and go away into the air. Meaning they won’t be in your food! Once a whole spice is ground, the surface area goes up by many orders of magnitude, meaning they begin to lose their punch immediately. In a few months, most ground spices are flat and dead. Keeping them well sealed in a cool dark place extends your time, but once ground, a spice has an expiration date.

Most spices can be purchased in a whole form, whole cumin seeds, whole nutmeg, whole coriander, etc. In these whole forms, the flavors are locked in, and shelf life is almost indefinite. When making a spice blend, just mix up what you need in whole form, grind it, and use that batch for the next few months. When you need more, just blend more!

Garam Masala Ingredients

• 5 teaspoons coriander seed
• 1 tablespoon cumin seed
• 1 tablespoon black peppercorns
• 1 teaspoon whole cloves
• 1 teaspoon cinnamon (or an inch of cinnamon stick)
• 1 teaspoon green cardomon pods

• 1 teaspoon nutmeg (about a 1/4 of a whole nut)

  Procedure

  In a dry pan over medium heat, toast the coriander and cumin for a few minutes. The color should just begin to change, it should smell delicious, and a few of the coriander seeds should just start to ‘pop’ like little popcorns, trying to leap out of the pan. Pour the toasted seeds into a spice grinder, mortar and pestle, or what I use, a blender. Add the other spices to the blender, put on the lid, and blend the hell out of it at high speed for a minute or two. If you need, stop the blender now and again, and mix things up in there for a good even grind. Don’t worry if its not super powdery, this is a hearty spice, and smallish chunks are OK.

  Put it into a spice bottle (this recipe makes enough to fill a small bottle), seal it well, and use it happily!

  Wasn’t that easy? Making your own spice blends is very easy, and the spices pack so much more kick now in their fresh form than anything your mega-mart would peddle to you. The spices will keep 3 months in that bottle, or longer if you refrigerate it. Its not that they will go ‘bad’ persay, they’ll just lose some of their punch, so if four months have gone by, don’t throw it away, just know that they aren’t as fresh, and use a bit more to compensate.

  What should you use it in? Well, my next post I’ll give a nice recipe for a lentil dahl that uses this very Garam Masala! You’ll probably like it. It’s easy to make too.

I’ve become pretty seriously addicted to a show called Good Eats. Supposedly it broadcasts on the Food Network, but I really don’t know. Probably six different people have independently recommended this show to me because they know I like science, cooking, and have a sense of humor.

I normally have mixed feelings about cooking shows. In my mind, I see a pretentious chef-school chef who has access to equipment and ingredients I’ve never heard of who in 24 minutes produces something I’d probably never eat, and couldn’t cook if I wanted to because of their quick treatment and step skipping. Now, I’ve seen a few that I’ve liked, but I never got that into them.

Good Eats, on the other hand, is right up my alley. The host, Alton Brown, is interested in keeping food simple, and prefers ingredients that are available to everyone. He even has shots of himself at the local restaraunt supply store or grocery store picking up the items. He also avoids recipes. Like myself, he feels that cooking should be an experiment, and that once you’ve got the basic idea of how to cook something, you can freely branch off on your own. He’s also a pretty silly, lighthearted guy, which is something I can relate to.

But most importantly, he describes some of the science behind the cooking. Instead of just telling you to do something, or worse, assuming you already know the technique, he shows you why a certain technique is important. He might use a Hoberman Sphere toy to demonstrate the molecular structure of bubbles in whipped cream, or puppets to describe how fat and water interact in a french fry. He even has food scientists and physicists appear on the show to explain certain properties of foods. I’m big on the ‘why’ of things, and I don’t feel comfortable using a cooking technique that I don’t understand. When you understand the why of the technique, the how often becomes apparent.

His simple, yet quality productions show you a basic recipe that includes all the correct techniques, setting you on the right direction for all your own experimentation.

Due to my aquisition of a large pile of his episodes, the last few days have been a cooking bonanza. I’ve made a few things based on his suggestions, but I’m now thinking more carefully about all of the things I cook, and imagining ways to improve techniques based on what is actually happening during the cooking process. We’ve made fish and chips, bruschetta, omelets, salsa, and had brownies in just the past few days. There is a reason my friend Barb calls this stuff ‘Food Porn’.

As you can see, I’m pretty pleased with Mr. Brown and his show. If you have the Food Network, you can probably just watch it. However, his shows are also available on DVD, or if you are an enterprising soul, you can download them via BitTorrent.

Here is a recipe for a spicy curryfied cous-cous that is really cheap to make, and very tasty, not to mention completely vegan. It reminds me of Nigerian food. Of course, because it uses new-world ingredients, its really a type of fusion food, but hey, I’m a fusion kind of guy.

It’s a simple recipe, and you are encouraged to change it around to your heart’s content. Like most of my recipies, it is not a finished product, but a work in progress.

Ingredients

• 1 cup dry cous cous
• 1 and 1/4 cup water
• 1 onion, finely chopped
• 1 bell pepper (any color, but red would be best), finely chopped
• a few tablespoons curry paste (yellow or panang paste would be best, but feel free to experiment with other kinds. The curry pastes from Patak are available in most groceries, and work nicely)
• a little olive oil
• some paprika
• a tablespoon or so of grated fresh ginger

• a chipotle pepper, finely chopped

  Procedure

  First, make the cous cous (aka couscous). I boil one and a quarter cups of water, then add the cup of dry cous cous, cover, and remove from heat. In a few minutes, the cous cous will soak up the water and be ready to rock.

  While the cous cous is going, heat up a wok or large pan with a little olive oil in the bottom. When hot (hot enough to ‘surprise’ the food when it hits the bottom), toss the onion and pepper into the pan and stir it as it heats up. Add the ginger, curry paste and chopped up chipotle. Watch out for the fumes coming off that chipotle, it might sting your eyes a bit. Feel the burn, and keep cooking.

  When the onions begin to soften, you are almost done. Grab that pot of finished cous cous, and toss it into the big pan or wok. Stir it up real good with the onions and peppers. If the curry paste hasn’t begun to coat all the cous cous, add a little more. Once it is fully mixed, add some paprika for color and paprika-goodness, and you are ready to eat!

  Notes

  Almost any saute-able veggie will work well in this. I used a green pepper and an onion tonight, because thats what I had around. You might try bamboo shoots, other colors of bell pepper (red would be particularly good, I think), some squash, or even some diced tomato or peas. Whatever it is, cut it small, so it doesn’t overwhelm the tiny cous couses.

  With a single chipotle pepper, the cous cous was ‘not very spicy’ to me, and ‘a little too spicy’ to Madalene. Somewhere in the middle, you’ll find the truth. Start with less chipotle pepper, and if you need more spice, you can add another chopped up pepper after its done, but while its still in the pan. Taste often to get your spice balance right. Chipotle peppers are usually found in a can in the Mexican area of your local grocer-mart. They are smoked jalapenos packed in adobo sauce, and they are crazy delicious. I’ve raved about them in other recipes.

  The curry paste is a mixture of spices like cumin, cilantro, peppers, tomato paste, and other goodies packed in oil and mushed into a paste. You can get it in the ‘international’ (Indian or Thai) section of your grocer-mart, or you can make your own pastes. I don’t have any good recipes for curry paste right now (if you’ve got one, send it my way!), so I’ve been using Patak brand curry paste, which is pretty common in grocery stores. Any curry paste will be good though, just a slightly different flavor. Note for vegetarians/vegans, some curry pastes contain shrimp paste or diced anchovies or something, so check the ingredients.

  This is a very fast and cheap meal, and is likely to become a staple for me. I made it for a little potluck down the street, and the people got a real kick out of it. I hope you do too!

One of the most fabulous beverages known to man and woman-kinds alike is the sublime Vietnamese Iced Coffee, or Caf� Sua Da (or even, Ca Phe Sua Da, to further transliterate. If you are Vietnamese, please let me know how this would actually be written in Vietnam!). This coffee, a rich french dark roast with chicory, made in a special version of the press pot, and served with copious quantities of sweetened condensed milk and refreshingly cooled with ice, is the perfect complement to any dish, and any occasion. Just don’t drink it if you are hoping to sleep soon. It also makes a nice alternative to the Thai Iced Tea recipe I’ve got. They are both great on a hot day, or with spicy southeast asian foods (or anything at all, frankly). Read on for a picture-heavy, overly analyzed method of making the best coffee in town.

Update: Sources for some of the equipment and ingredients are now listed at the bottom of the page, read on to see more. Continue Reading »

Just to pass some time, I’m going to give you the recipe I use for making hummus, the delicious Middle Eastern/Mediterranean spread of goodness.

As usual with my recipes, the amounts aren’t exact, and every batch I make is a little different. This is only a starting place for you to experiment from. Learn the flavors, learn the food, and relish the fact that each batch is unique and special.

Ingredients

• Two cans of Garbanzo Beans (AKA Chick Peas).
• A good scoop of Tahini (maybe 1/8th to 1/4 cup)
• A good splash of Lemon Juice (about the same amount as the Tahini)
• Two or three cloves of Fresh Garlic
• Dash of salt
• A little dollop of Olive Oil (less than the amount of Lemon Juice)
• Something(s) for flavor
  • Chipotle peppers?
  • Paprika?
  • Chili Powder?
  • Scallions?
  • Red bell pepper?
  • Dill?
  • Curry powder?
  • Radish?
• Be creative!

• A Blender

  Procedure

  Open one can of Garbanzo Beans, but don’t drain the liquid. Put the whole can, liquid and all, in the blender. Take the other can of Garbanzo beans, open it, and drain this one. Blend the first can’s worth in the blender for a moment, until it starts to break up and get pasty. This will be way too liquidy for hummus. But thats ok, because now you add the second can, the one you drained, and blend that in. Now you have garbanzo paste.

  Add the other ingredients, stirring them in, then running the blender to get them all mixed up. You can chop up the garlic first if you don’t have a vigorous blender, but I usually just toss the cloves in whole.

  A note about Tahini. First, what the hell is it? Its a butter made from sesame seeds. Tahini is to sesame seeds what peanut butter is to peanuts. It is a very pale tan color, almost grey, and it is fairly liquidy, more so than other nut butters. It seperates easily so make sure to give it a good stir. You can get it at many grocery stores in the Mediterranean or Middle Eastern sections, if they have them. You can also get it at most international food stores, and Whole Foods stores and other ‘natural’ stores often sell it in bulk. It has a lot of nutty bite to it, and makes good sauces when mixed with some lemon juice, garlic and water. It is also essential to the flavor of hummus.

  Once you’ve added all the main ingredients, you have a basic hummus that is good all on its own. Taste it, and see if you like it. If it needs more tangyness, add some more lemon juice. If it needs some more bite, add some more tahini. If it seems too thick, add a little bit more olive oil. If it is just missing ‘something’, you can try adding a little more salt, but go easy. Its easy to add more of something, hard to take it out.

  I recommend tasting all of the individual ingredients so you can get an idea of how they come together to make the final product. That will help you decide what you like more or less of.

  Once you have your basic hummus, its time to go nuts with some flavor. I personally like to add two or three chipotle peppers (a smoked jalapeno that is incredibly good, and quite spicy), some paprika for color, and a dash of onion powder. Sometimes I just add chili powder if I’m lazy. Chopped scallions can also be quite charming, as well as fresh or dried red bell pepper. Experiment with dill too. I’ve had great curry hummus, and fresh veggies like radishes can sometimes be surprisingly good. You can take a piece of pita bread, scoop up some of the raw hummus, and sprinkle some seasoning on it. Give it a try. You can try lots of seasonings this way, and you’ll surely find something you adore.

  Once you’ve seasoned your hummus, you can either eat it right away, or store it in the fridge overnight. The next day the flavors will have blended a bit better, and the bits of garbanzo bean will have soaked up some of the excess liquid and your hummus will have a slightly better texture. This recipe makes a lot of hummus though, so I usually just eat my fill after making it, and then the rest just needs to sit in the fridge anyway, so it all works out. If you have good tasty olive oil, a nice thing to do when you serve the hummus is make a small indentation in the top of the hummus pile and pour a bit of the olive oil in. Then as the hummus is eaten, the oil will drain over the surface of the hummus and add a nice flavor to each bite.

  I like to eat hummus with pita bread, just tearing hunks off the bread and scooping the hummus, but it also goes good on bagels, in sandwiches, on crackers, as an appetizer with olives, on fresh veggies, etc.

  Enjoy!

And now for something completely different… A salsa recipe.

This is the basic salsa that Berg and I made the other night. It turned out delicious, so I thought I’d document it for your pleasure. Many people don’t realize how easy it is to make salsa, and I hope that maybe some people might give it a try.

Ingredients

• One 28oz can of diced tomatoes
• One small green pepper, or half of a big honkin’ one
• One small yellow or white onion
• A carrot
• A small can of green chilies
• Some pickled jalapeno slices or
• A few chipotle peppers, preferably in adobo sauce
• A few cloves of garlic
• A small handful of fresh cilantro
• Black pepper
• White pepper
• A li’l salt

• Some lime juice

  Procedure

  Its easy. Just dice everything up, and mix it together. I like to put the can of tomatoes (juice and all) in a blender, and hit it for about one second, just to chop it up a tiny bit finer, but thats it. Then I move the tomatoes into a bowl, and do the rest of the dicing by hand. Dice up the pepper, toss it in. Dice up the onion, toss it in. Grate the carrot (or dice it), and toss it in. Crack open that little can of green chilies, and toss it in. Slice up the jalepeno slices, and toss those mofos in. Then add a bit of the juice from the jar of pickled jalapenos, its vinegary and good. Then slice up the chipotle peppers and put them in. They are spicy, so watch out. I put in two medium sized peppers for medium spicyness. Put in one for mild, or three or four for more heat. Chop the cilantro up real fine, and toss it in. Same with the garlic. Add some black pepper. Then add some more. Add some white pepper too, if you’ve got it. Add a dash of salt and a squirt of lime and you are ready to rock.

  Then eat it. Actually, for maximum goodness, let it sit covered in the fridge overnight for the flavors to mix. But this is fresh salsa, you can eat it right away if you want (we do).

  Here are some notes on ingredients. First, remember that my recipes are very vague, and I like them that way. That means that if you really like something, or don’t like it, add more or less of it, thats fine. You can also leave things out if you don’t have them, but be careful that you don’t leave out too much, or you might be missing critical flavors.

  In this dish, the tomato and jalapeno or chipotle peppers are the core. If you have nothing else, you must have these two. Chipotle peppers are superior in many ways to regular jalapenos. They are jalapenos that have been deeply smoked underground, and they often come in a rich smoky sauce called adobo. There are few things in the world more flavorful than a chipotle. They are smoky, peppery, hot, and just damn hell ass delicious. If you are using fresh jalapenos, thats cool too, but you miss out on a bit of smokyness, and your salsa will be less homogenous, that is, you’ll have hot bites, and cooler bites as you hit the jalapeno bits. The smoking and pickling processes help bring out the spice and cause it to blend better with the rest of the salsa. If you are using pickled jalapenos, add some of the brine, its salty and vinegary and will add a bit of acid to your salsa that it can use.

  After you have these two basic ingredients, you need to elaborate on the flavor. I like green chilies, so I add a can. Add fresh ones too if you want. Fresh green peppers add a little bite of fresh coolness that I find delightful. Onions are important too, they add a good bite. Carrot is an odd one, people see carrot in there and they get a little question mark over their head. I don’t know why I put it in, but it belongs there. Of all the best salsa’s I’ve ever eaten, nearly all contained carrot. Why? I can’t say, but you should do it.

  For general seasoning, fresh garlic is super. Dice up a few cloves real fine and toss them in. Garlic salt will do the trick in a pinch, but fresh garlic is best, and it keeps for a long time, so don’t worry about keeping some on hand. Black pepper is good too, don’t skimp. White pepper adds a peppery flavor as well, but with less bite than black pepper. Its a good flavorful spice. A touch of salt can sometimes round things out a bit, but use your judgment, don’t add too much. A blast of lime juice is a nice flavor, and a good source of acid to help things blend flavors better.

  Cilantro is a touchy subject, but frankly I love it. Even if you don’t, you should still put some in, as it is key to this type of fresh salsa. I put a lot in usually. Consult with your other salsa eaters though, because I find cilantro is often a love/hate issue with people, and you don’t want to offend your cilantro-hating friends (as much as they may deserve it).

  So there you go, yummy salsa. Nearly all those ingredients are optional, just use as many as you have around, and you’ll end up with a tasty salsa for sure.

As many of you know, I’m a vegetarian. I eat this way for many reasons, including, but not limited to, ethics, environmentalism, health, etc. However, today I broke with my lifestyle. I did not choose to violate my own code, but I couldn’t help myself. What could possibly have caused Sam to give up his strict diet, if only for a moment? I’ll tell you.

A bug. Yes, a little bug, probably a small gnat or fly. As I was pulling up to my house on the scooter, I cracked my helmet’s visor open. The moist weather means that at low speeds, when the vents aren’t flowing, the visor has a tendency to fog up. Opening it a bit helps out. Also, as fate would have it, I was joyously singing Parliament Funk’s “Get Up With the Down Stroke”. I was on the part where they sing, “Make my funk the P-Funk! I like my funk un-cut!”, when the insect flew into my helmet, and down my throat. I felt it thwap into the back of my palate, and I felt a bit sickly as I reflexively swallowed, consuming the insect.

To atone for my transgression, I’m now eating a completely vegan meal. Actually I’m not big on the whole ‘atonement’ concept, I just wanted some curry, and vegan is how I make it anyway. So without further ado, here is the basic recipe for Sam’s Easy Vegan Curry Surprise, serves four not-very-hungry people, three regular people, or two really hungry ones. It also saves well in the fridge, so make extra and eat that sucker for lunch the next day:

Ingredients

• One medium potato.
• One bell pepper, preferably red or yellow.
• One can bamboo shoots.
• One small or medium onion (white or yellow).
• One small apple, preferably a firm, tart variety, like Granny Smith.
• One block of tofu, extra firm.
• Some curry paste, either hot or mild.
• Some coconut milk (in a can).

• Brown basmati rice.

  Procedure

  First, cut the veggies and tofu up into pieces. Use standard stir-fry size pieces, about the size of a bottle cap. Then begin preparing the potato. I toss the pieces of potato in a microwave safe bowl with a little olive oil, and microwave it for 6 minutes. You can also boil them. Meanwhile, start the rice cooking as per the directions on the box. Then put a little olive oil in a pan or wok, and get it up to heat, around medium/medium-high, and toss in the tofu. Stir-fry the tofu until it is golden brown on all sides. Then pull the tofu out of the pan and set it aside. I usually just put it into the same container as the potato if the potato is done by now (it probably is).

  Then begin stir-frying the other veggies in the pan. Do the peppers and onions for a moment, then add the apple and bamboo shoots. Use a little olive oil to keep things lubricated, but go easy on it. As they cook, add some curry paste, and some coconut milk. Use good judgment here, you don’t need to add a lot at once. I usually put in about two or three heaping spoonfuls of the paste, and a 1/4 cup of the coconut milk. Then I stir things up, taste it, and add more curry paste to taste. Whenever you add the curry paste, add a bit more coconut milk. The coconut milk serves to create the ‘sauce’, and is an emulsifier, which is a good thing for this dish. I like to end up with a fairly dry curry, not like a soup or stew or anything, but with enough sauce at the bottom of the pan so that when I spoon out my curry on top of the basmati rice, the sauce dribbles down and flavors the rice. Dig?

  As the veggies cook, feel free to taste the food regularly, to see if you need more curry paste or coconut milk. When the veggies are nearing complete, only a few minutes, add the tofu and potato. The potato should help thicken the sauce a bit, and you may need to add more curry paste and coconut milk at this point to balance the additional mass and thickening capacity of the potato. Cook for another few minutes, until everything looks good and hot. When the rice is done, just lay some rice down on your plate, and spoon some curry on. Enjoy, preferably with a good porter.

  Oh, and if you are wondering why “surprise” is in the name, then well, I don’t really know. Maybe it’s the apple. Its a great flavor in curry, but it is a bit surprising to bite into something sweet and tart, especially if you don’t know it is there!

Thai Iced Tea. If you’ve ever been to a Thai restaurant, you know this delicious orange beverage. It is very strong, very sweet, and very good. It also has a great presentation, with its bright color and the layers formed by the milk. Here is my recipe for this tasty iced tea, which is the perfect complement to a hot day, or a hot dish.

Ingredients

• 2/3 cup Thai tea leaves


• 1 2/3 cup Water


• 1/2 cup Sugar


• 1 1/2 cup Evaporated Milk (12oz can)

Procedure

Bring the water to a boil. Remove from heat and quickly add the tea leaves. Mix it up good so all the tea leaves get moistened. Cover and let steep for 4-5 minutes. Be careful not to let it go longer, or you will get a more bitter tea. Strain out the tea leaves by pouring through a strainer into a pitcher. Stir in the sugar until dissolved. When serving, pour the sweetened tea over ice, but leave the top inch or two of the glass empty. Pour evaporated milk into the glass until full. Enjoy! Serves 2.

Notes

I like to serve it with a straw, so people can mix up the layers if they like, or keep them separate and sip alternately between layers. Part of the goodness of this beverage is the uniqueness, so anything you can do to accentuate the uniqueness is good.

As far as the ingredients go, I usually find myself using less than the recommended amount of evaporated milk, but some people like more milk than I do. Also, some people premix the milk with the tea before serving, but I think that makes the drink less fun. However, if you are making tea for a lot of people, or want to lessen your work, you can make a big batch of the tea, and then simply add the milk at the time of serving. I like to make a quadruple batch (or more) of the sweetened tea, and then just save it in the fridge and keep a few cans of evaporated milk handy. Then its ready for whenever I want some, with minimal preparation.

As far as ingredients go, the hardest to find item is the Thai tea leaves. Go to your local asian food store and look for “Thai Seasoning Mix” or “Thai Tea Dust”. It usually comes in a clear plastic brick-like bag, and looks like dark brown shredded tea leaves. The kind I have right now is called “Police Dog Brand Thai Tea Dust.” Evaporated milk can be substituted with soy or rice milk (I recommend Odwalla Milk, if you can get it, its a mixture of oat milk, rice milk, soy milk, and a little banana/mango puree) if you want to make it vegan. You can also substitute white sugar for evaporated cane juice or “raw sugar”.

For a strainer, you’ll need a pretty fine strainer. Traditionally, a tea ‘sock’ is used, which is a sock-like piece of linen with its opening pulled open by a loop of wire. They are available at many asian food stores. You can also use a regular kitchen strainer, but you’ll let through more sediment. Basically, you want as fine of a strainer as you can get your hands on. Of course, if you only have a basic kitchen strainer, it will still work, you’ll just have more little floaties in the tea, and they won’t hurt you.